At the beginning of every group, we have our participants share their name and about their loved one who died. This offers meaningful connection and presence to each person’s journey.
My name is Cassie. My dad, Earl, died from cancer in 2019. He went through treatments and hospitalization for several years before his death. As all our group members know, our loved ones are so much more than their deaths. The loss of them affects all aspects of our lives and can make holidays, like Father’s Day, difficult to experience. A common question that is asked in our groups is what to do as a family on Father’s Day.
The best way to find how to honor our dad’s that have died on Father’s Day is to look at how they lived. My dad had a favorite barbecue spot and loved to drink soda out of their frosted mugs. When we want to remember him as a family, we tend to eat at that restaurant and enjoy the hot, fresh, buttery rolls.
My dad was a man who loved his family and being a grandpa. I try spending Father’s Day celebrating those who are living in my family and are fathers. I tell them of the love I have for them. I have learned the importance of saying what we admire about those we love before they die.
There is no perfect way to honor Father’s Day after you experience the loss of your dad. The way it’s celebrated may change over the years, and that is okay. No matter the choice we make on that day, there will be feelings of grief, such as anger, loneliness, and sadness.
We need to allow ourselves to feel what we need to feel around the holidays. I encourage you to share stories and pictures of your loved ones with your family. You may be scared or nervous to start these conversations about your loved ones but being willing to open up can help decrease the feelings of loneliness that can be experienced in our grief. I hope you and your family can find some joy and comfort this Father’s Day.
